The Catch

What's a girl to do when she struggles with her reality and someone else's? Let me set this up for you. It all started two days ago when having a catch up date with my friend who I'll call J.R. We began talking about relationships as I mentioned not wanting to become an "Old Maid." He informed me in his colorful to the point personality that I am still young and have plenty time to find love. And it isn't that I disagree with him but I have felt pressures that I need to get on the good foot and snatch up a man! "Pressure from who?" J.R. asked. "Society, the world!" I said. "Pressure from who?" J.R. asked again. Seeing where that debate was headed I digressed and we continued our chat. J.R. expressed that I shouldn't feel pressure to be like anyone else and yes, I agree.

J.R. went on to describe a hilarious analogy that I hadn't heard before. In his funny full of many flavors jargon he described my lovers lane envy like this, in a nutshell:

"Think about it like this, girl. You get to an amusement park, I don't know which one, any of them and you're wanting to do what everybody else is doing. So you eat the cotton candy like everyone else, you walk all around the amusement park laughing and enjoying the time. Then like everyone else you see they go to play the games and begin winning prizes and stuffed animals. So you want one too. You play the game AND win! Next everyone else you see wants to ride on the roller coaster but you then realize you can't bring that big ass stuffed animal on the ride. Now what do you do? You wanted what everyone else had, now you got it."

Yes, J.R. is quite a character in person and he can indulge and exaggerate a bit but I could see in some ways what he meant! Now, I am not one to necessarily "follow" anyone, I've always been pretty independent. But in human-like fashion if there's something that someone else has and I think it's really cool or nice to have, I might want it. I don't quite know if J.R. was saying, "don't waste your time," or was he saying "there are accommodations one has to make in getting on a roller coaster, oh I mean a relationship? I assume the latter, and I didn't ask further, I merely laughed at such a detailed description. You'd had to have witnessed him saying it to get the full effect because he went on for at LEAST five minutes. :-)

But when it comes to relationships or wanting to be in one, what are the deal breakers? Do I need to make accommodations or do I get on the roller coaster and enjoy the ride? There's always a "catch" to something, right? Though I'm not really concerned about all of that. What I do know is I have to somehow get myself in the "game" of love. Not necessarily hitting the club or anything over the top but just planting myself in the path of a one of a kind joy ride. But, maybe I don't need to do too much and just....chill. Let this (my) journey continue to unfold on its own, shuffle the deck of cards and just....deal.

I just have to trust and have faith. And I have to wonder, is that "the catch?"

-Lish, The BCB